Should I litigate or mediate my child custody issues?

The decision between litigation and mediation for child custody issues depends on various factors, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Both options have their advantages and disadvantages, and the best choice for you will depend on your specific situation and preferences. Here are some considerations for both:


  1. Court Decision: If you and the other parent cannot reach an agreement through negotiation or mediation, a court will make the final decision.
  2. Legal Representation: In litigation, it's common for each party to hire an attorney to represent their interests.
  3. Formal Process: Litigation follows a formal legal process, including court hearings, legal filings, and potentially a trial.


  1. Collaborative Process: Mediation involves a neutral third party (the mediator) who helps facilitate communication and negotiation between you and the other parent.
  2. Control and Flexibility: Mediation allows you to have more control over the decision-making process and can be more flexible in finding creative solutions.
  3. Preservation of Relationship: Mediation may help maintain a more amicable relationship between parents, which can be beneficial for the child.


  1. Communication: If you and the other parent can communicate effectively, mediation may be a viable option. If communication is strained or hostile, litigation may be necessary.
  2. Complexity of Issues: If your case involves complex legal issues, such as abuse allegations or significant disagreements on major issues, litigation may be more appropriate.
  3. Cost: Litigation can be expensive due to legal fees and court costs. Mediation is often more cost-effective.
  4. Time: Mediation may resolve issues more quickly than the court process, which can be lengthy.

Before making a decision, it's advisable to consult with an attorney to understand the legal implications in your specific jurisdiction. Additionally, consider consulting with a mediator to explore whether a cooperative resolution is possible. In some cases, a combination of both approaches (mediation for certain issues and litigation for others) may be the most suitable option. Ultimately, the best choice will depend on your unique circumstances and the dynamics involved.